The Gordon Riots?

If it all goes pear-shaped in a fortnight's time some of these people are going to look very silly indeed:

Stars set to join the U2 frontman on the Long Walk to Justice march in the city on 6 July include Claudia Schiffer, Jude Law and Sienna Miller. Bob Geldof has called for a million people to head to Edinburgh for the march.

That's for the Million Moron March on the Wednesday, by no means the only occasion for autograph hunters:

Earlier that week, some of Hollywood's biggest names, including Brad Pitt and George Clooney, will be in the city to take part in the Make Poverty History march on 2 July. The actors will be joined by singers Natalie Imbruglia and Ronan Keating, supermodel Kate Moss, director Richard Curtis and comedian Lenny Henry.

There's still time for the glitterati to undertake an intensive study of economics before early July - perhaps even enough time for them to discover that free trade is the only trade that's fair, contrary to what these people may believe.

The Chancellor of the Exchequer may well understand the moral and economic case for totally free trade. He's from Kirkcaldy, after all. I imagine that he's jumped on the Geldof bandwagon as part of his campaign to replace the husband of the Scouse Spouse. However, if there is violence in Scotland Dr Brown stands to lose far more than his more glamorous fellow-marchers, some of whom may not even know in which country they are protesting.